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What I Should Have Said

I lost a friend recently.

He was a great guy who was always willing to help those around him, regardless of his own needs. Selfless. Kind. Compassionate.

I had a phone conversation with him a few months back. We lived in different states and mostly stayed in touch online, but I gave him a call and we talked for over an hour about work, life, family, and more. In the conversation, he recommended a movie that he loved called Green Book.

When he passed, I realized that I hadn’t made time to watch the movie yet, so this weekend I carved out some time to enjoy it with my wife. It was a great movie, and every time I saw someone on screen standing up to do the right thing, I thought of my friend and the impact he had in his time on the earth.

When people make mistakes in life, you can either choose to vilify them and write them off or you can choose to believe in the goodness of people and that they still have value. He was in the latter camp, and I am so thankful that I had a chance to see him in person several times over the course of the last 10 years. He was quick to smile and always had a kind word or compliment to share with those around him.

We never know how much time we have with those we love, whether they be friends or family. In the midst of all this chaos swirling around us, I have implored each of us to be kind to those around us, but it’s easy to lose focus when things are out of what feels like their natural rhythm.

I’m resolving to say what I should have said this week. Not in a backbiting or angry way, but in a way that would honor the memory of my friend, Chris Fields. When I talk with someone, anyone, this week, I’m going to say what I should have said but held back, whether that is “I’m sorry,” “I love you,” or “thank you for who you are.”

Chris, we will miss you. Thank you for making us all better just by being here.

3 thoughts on “What I Should Have Said

  1. Jennifer Hudson

    So very sorry for the loss of your friend. Thank you for sharing a poignant reminder of what matters. Greatly appreciate your content and contribution to the HR community.

    Reply

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