If Batman was in HR

 

Batman tat. Coolness.
Batman tat. Coolness.

I’m a Batman fan. Yes, my geekery is showing, but you know it’s fun to watch! What if Batman was in HR? What would happen? Well, here are a few of my thoughts, but I’d love to hear yours, too!

  1. Strategic plans would always begin with the phrase: “hop into the Batmobile.”
  2. Theft of office supplies would drop drastically.
  3. Capes and masks would be required in the new dress code.
  4. Senior management would be known as “villains.”
  5. He could give a drug screen, interview an applicant, and terminate an employee using gadgets in his utility belt.
  6. He’d teach the receptionist seven forms of martial arts to use on annoying sales people.
  7. Office hours would be 8pm-4am.
  8. Admins would be called “sidekicks.”
  9. Christmas bonuses would be $1M per employee from an “anonymous donor.”
  10. Employees would be too terrified to perform poorly.
  11. Job titles like “bat-accountant” and “bat-IT manager” would be commonplace.

I’m sure that’s not all, but I need some help! What would be different if Batman was in your HR department?

18 thoughts on “If Batman was in HR”

  1. Debbie Brown

    Ben my son Kevin (aka Carlos Santana) says superman is way better than batman.. Super powers no gadgets. Don’t you think Xray vision, leaping tall buildings, stoping speeding locomotives and ofcourse flying.. These would come in handy (according to Carlos).

    Ps I read out here that entepreneurs bring supplies to work from home so you dont have to worry about that group batman !

  4. adowling

    I could use a Bat Cave. My office would have a secret entrance that only I and my butler knew how to get to. Said butler would bring me coffee, do my reports for me and help me get out of an employee meeting that I really didnt want to go to.

    In my Bat World, I’m Batman; in case you couldn’t tell. Except I’m not all airy talking like Christian Bale was in the most recent Batman. My mad ninja skillz will come in handy when I’m in my bat suit. Judo Chop!

  6. Trish McFarlane

    That was hysterical Ben. Is that really your tat? If so, I am SO impressed now!! I decided I am going to work tomorrow and calling my assistant my sidekick from now on. I will say I like Batman but I am particularly fond of Catwoman…..m-e-o-w!!

  7. Ben Post author

    @Debbie A Superman one might be in the works, but Batman’s definitely my favorite superhero. :-)
    @Shauna Not my tattoo (and if you click, you can see the better original photo) But that dude’s still full of that geeky awesomeness!
    @Alicia LOL Another idea right there. :-) Maybe soon…
    @April Ha! I feel insignificant next to your bat-genius. :-)
    @Steve Oooh! That is perfect! See? I knew there was a great idea that I missed!
    @Trish No, but thanks for thinking I’m that cool. :-D Sidekick sounds like more fun, anyway!

  8. The HR Store

    Hilarious! In Bat-World…ALL employees and new-hires should undergo ‘BatCamp’ (ala BootCamp) to get introduced to ‘BatWay’ @ Work! ‘ :) Not easy to work nights dressed in Capes & Masks.

  11. Krista Francis

    Thanks for the laughs, Ben! I am going to repost my “Human Resources Sidekick” position and order my own utility belt!

  13. Jody Skinner

    If Batman were in HR… all policies would be written in riddles. Oh wait!! That’s not a change.

  14. Angela B

    – Line managers would use the Bat-phone to request help.
    – Sidekicks, er…Bat-Admins or Robin the Admin would have to exclaim things like “Holy HR”, “Irritating I-9s” or “Outrageous Overtime” when confronted with awkward employee issues
    – The secret identity would actually help reduce the number of after-hours e-mails

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